Six months apart
by HR always live on
Summary: Set after Cotterdam, HR. They've been apart for six months, when Malcolm makes a discovery which will clear Ruth's name. Harry goes to find her, and gets a surprise when he does. Now complete.
1. Chapter 1

"No don't say it," Ruth said, her hand cradling his face gently. "Just leave it alone. Leave it as something wonderful that was never said."

"But you know," he said.

"Harry, I have to leave," she said. "You're going to make that so much harder if you say those words. So I am asking you, for me. Please, don't."

"Okay," he said. "It shouldn't have ended like this. It should have been..."

"Yes," she said. "We both know how it should have been," she added sadly. Before she could think about it, she leaned in and kissed him very, very softly. It was freezing, but her lips were warm and he gravitated towards her. He flicked his tongue over them and she sighed a sigh full of passion and lost chances.

"Don't go," he said, even though he knew it was fruitless.

"I don't want to go," she said. He gripped her hand and squeezed so hard that it was painful but she didn't pull away. Suddenly the boats horn blared out. "I have to go."

"Don't forget me," he said, as in that moment he was struck by a huge fear that once she'd left the country, he would fade from her mind.

"It's not possible," she said with a smile. His grip was still tight on her hand. "You have to let me go Harry." With great reluctance, he did. "Goodbye." She turned from him, seeming poised and sure of herself as she got onto the boat. That was until she turned and her eyes caught his. Those beautiful blue eyes, which always showed her emotions. At least to him. At the moment they were full of regret, longing, pain and that four letter word he wasn't allowed to say to her. Harry stayed perfectly still as the boat became a smaller and smaller dot on the landscape. He stayed there until he was looking at nothing but the iron grey of the Thames, leading out into the ocean. He stayed there until it started to rain, and no one would be able to see the silent tears rolling down his face.

* * *

**6 Months Later.**

Harry poured a generous measure of whisky. Then doubled it. He hadn't been home in more than two days now. Bloody terrorists. They were always so inconsiderate. But in the end, nothing serious had happened. No British citizen had been injured, or death on his conscience. No bombs had detonated, and the suspects were in British custody. So it had been a good, if exhausting day. He took a large gulp of the fortifying drink and then sighed as the door opened.

"You could knock," he said tersely.

"Fine," Malcolm said, curling his hand into a fist and rapping his knuckles smartly on Harry's desk. "This is important."

"It always is," Harry said. "Okay, can it wait until tomorrow? I need some sleep before I focus on the next crisis."

"No, it cant wait," Malcolm said. Something in his face had Harry's senses on full alert.

"Sit down," he said, nodding at the chair. Malcolm did, a file clutched in his hands. "So what is it? Do we need to hide in a nuclear bunker?"

"No," Malcolm said. "I found something. While trawling the C system and infiltrating the..." Harry tuned out as the technical speak started to go over his head.

"Okay, you found something," he said. "I don't care where. What is it?"

"Read it," Malcolm said, handing it over carefully. There were five minutes of total silence as Harry absorbed what was written on the pages in front of him. Once he'd read it once, he gave it another go.

"Is this what I think it is?" Harry asked.

"Yes," Malcolm replied.

"Proof?"

"Yes," he said again. "She's innocent, and we can prove it. We can bring her home."

It took Harry a good sixty seconds to actually think about that sentence. Home. She could come home. For the first time in six months, he smiled.

* * *

He couldn't sleep. Every time he closed his eyes, Ruth was behind his eyelids. What would she look like now? Where was she? What had she been doing for the past six months? These were things he didn't know. He had refused to look for her, even through the temptation. If there was a record of her being alive and well on MI5 computers, it would be a very bad thing indeed. So, he hadn't looked. She could be anywhere on the planet by now, he knew Zaf had arranged a false passport for her. Was she happy? Did she miss him?

He missed her, every single day. He missed her understated beauty, her quiet intelligence and especially the way her eyes would light up when she looked at him. He missed everything about her, a powerful ache that never left him. An ache where his heart should be. It hurt to think of her, separated as they were. But it hurt much more if he didn't think of her at all.

Malcolm had promised to find her, but they both knew it would take a few days. Probably longer, as they were planning on tracking one of the most intelligent MI5 operatives Harry had ever known. Even with Malcolm's brilliance it would take time. But there was hope. He would find her, and (assuming her life hadn't moved on drastically) he would bring her home. He couldn't wait to see her once more. He needed to see her calm beauty. Even if it were just once more, his soul yearned for her.

* * *

"Got you," Malcolm said, looking at the CCTV screen. He was looking at the very grainy footage of a second hand bookshop in the outskirts of Prague. A brunette woman had come in, wrapped in a bulky coat against the cold and the falling snow outside. She shook her hair, so it would be free of the white flakes. She spent a good twenty minutes browsing the books, and when she turned to look at a shelf on the opposite side of the shop, Malcolm had frozen the image. It was Ruth. It was finally her. He'd been looking for her for a week now, all the time with an irate and impatient Harry breathing down his neck. He'd followed her to Prague and found out that a woman called Lucy Taylor was working as a translator for a law office in Prague. Lucy Taylor was the name on the passport Zaf had given Ruth, so he'd looked for her. And looked. Even when he found her, he realised that she was avoiding the major places in the city, anywhere that was likely to have CCTV cameras. Ruth was probably frightened, he thought grimly. But here was the proof. Ruth was alive, well and living in Prague.

Malcolm printed off the image, then wrote down Lucy Taylors address in Prague, her place of work and her phone number. He put that, Ruth's recently reclaimed passport and the image of Ruth in an envelope, and then set it on Harry's desk. He knew his friend would want to be alone when he opened that.

* * *

_**Meanwhile in Prague**_

Ruth moaned as she woke up with an intense pressure on her rib. The baby was kicking her, and none too gently either. "Oh baby," she sighed. It was two in the morning, couldn't she give it a rest? Ruth sat up and wrapped her arms around her large stomach in discomfort. The baby had seemed to decide that two in the morning was the perfect time to perform acrobatics, including kicking her ribs. This was the third night this week that the baby had woken her.

"Well, it's a preparation for the sleepless nights of motherhood," she said to herself. She felt a soft thump in reply and smiled. Stranded in a foreign country, away from home she might be. But she wasn't alone.

* * *

**I've read (and written) quite a few stories where Ruth comes back to the UK with a child after Cotterdam. I wanted to try one where she's pregnant. Hope you enjoy this. And it started off life as a one shot, and its grown from there.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks for all the great reviews and encouragement for this story. Enjoy!**

* * *

Harry's eyes were itching with tiredness as the plane landed at Vaclav Havel airport. He hadn't slept, not properly slept, in about two days. His mind was filled with Ruth, images of her and imagining her reaction to his presence. All he had, to know she was alive was a grainy CCTV image. If he hadn't known it to be her, or if he hadn't spent many weeks on the grid watching every nuance of her face, he might not have even realised it was her. He was almost dreading seeing her, and at the same time he couldn't wait. He was terrified that she'd moved on. That she wouldn't want to come home to London, or her interest in him had faded. He knew perfectly well that he was being irrational, but he couldn't help it.

He needed to see her. That would be the only thing which would make his horrible fears vanish. But he also knew he'd have to wait a good eight hours or so. Knocking on her door when she'd been in hiding for half a year was a good way to end up injured. He'd be surprised in the extreme if Ruth didn't keep a gun with her at all times, as she was meant to be dead. Now, he knew she was a poor shot, but creeping around her flat in the middle of the night wasn't a good idea. So he had to spend the night in a hotel room, tossing and turning until he saw her. It was going to be a long night.

* * *

Ruth couldn't find her keys. Her flat was tiny and yet she still lost everything, including her keys, her phone and on one occasion, one shoe (which she never had found). She stopped moving, retracing her steps from the night before, and she found her keys by the microwave. Then she listened, as she thought she heard something outside. She had about fifteen neighbours in the building, but she was still alert for noises out of the ordinary. She clutched her keys tightly in her right hand, stilling the noise of them. Then she heard it. Footsteps on the stairs, and a pause outside of her door.

She took her gun out of her handbag and took the safety off at the same moment as there was a knock on the door. Walking carefully towards it she opened it a fraction, keeping the chain on. "Oh God." The man behind the door was the one she'd thought and dreamed of so many times. Almost as if she'd conjured him here from the mere force of her thoughts.

"Open the door Ruth," Harry murmured, his voice almost cracking with emotion.

"Yeah," she breathed. She put the gun down and fumbled with the lock, desperate to open it. When she did, she simply stared at him, as he did her, their eyes never leaving each others face. "You're here," she said quietly, looking into his beautiful hazel eyes. "Oh God, you're here."

"So are you," he said, voice husky with emotion. "You're even more beautiful than I remembered." He looked at her longer hair and the way it curled slightly around her face, hanging on her shoulders and her pale skin was almost shining at him. She was beautiful, incredibly so, especially now, her eyes bright with emotion.

"Harry what are you doing here?"

"To see you," he said. "Its been… a long time."

"Yes," she said, smiling at his wonderfully familiar face. "Oh, you look good."

He managed to tear his gaze off of her expressive eyes for a moment, to take in the rest of her, and as his eyes travelled down her figure, he froze. He saw her large, obviously pregnant stomach and he couldn't think of a single thing to say.

"Er… he stared at her, unable to look away from her bump. "You're…"

"Yes," she said quietly. It was rather pointless to deny after all.

"Oh God," he said, looking back at her face. "I hate to be… um… I just… I don't know what you've been through since you left London and… Is it… mine?"

"Of course it's yours Harry," she said gently. She was slightly offended that he had to ask, but looking at his face, she knew perfectly well that he was totally shocked. He was saying what was going through his mind, without thinking it through, something Harry never did. Every word he spoke was usually measured before he voiced it.

"Oh God, I…" he blurted. He'd suddenly gone very pale and Ruth wondered if he was going to faint. "I think I need to sit down."

She moved aside and Harry sat on the sofa, half staggering and breathing heavily. He collapsed on the chair, his face in his hands as he tried to keep a handle on his sanity. "Harry, are you…?"

"I'll be okay in a minute," he said heavily. Ruth closed the door with a quiet click and watched him, almost unable to believe he was really here, sitting on her old and faded sofa. While he got his breath back Ruth looked at him, reminded vividly on what his presence did to her. It was almost as if she couldn't breathe. The tension that had always been there between them on the grid was back. And after so many months apart, it felt even more acute.

He looked up at her, but with the fact that he was sitting and she standing, her stomach was incredibly prominent. She seemed to sense this and sat down next to him, with a space between them.

"How…" he sighed.

"I think you know how," she said with a slight smile.

"I was going to say, how are you?"

"I'm okay," she said softly.

"Did you know?" he asked, voice husky with emotion. "When Cotterdam happened and you had to leave, did you know you were pregnant?"

"No," she said. "Do you really think I wouldn't have told you?"

"Right now, I have absolutely no idea," he said. He looked at her and let a small smile form on his face. "I can barely remember my own name."

"You know, I've never seen you shocked before," she said. After a moment she reached for him and held his hand gently. It was the first time they'd touched in months and Harry curled his fingers around her palm.

"I must admit, I wasn't expecting to find you pregnant," he said.

Ruth was about to say something, but instead she gasped as the baby kicked. Harry looked at her. "She's kicking," Ruth said.

Two words that made several questions explode in Harry's mind. "She?"

"Oh, I don't know," Ruth said quickly. "I've been calling the baby "she", so I don't call it, "it." I don't actually know whether it's a girl or a boy." Her brow creased as she felt another movement from the baby.

"Can I?" he asked, looking at her stomach. She smiled and took his hand, pressing it to her stomach. They both waited and then there was a small but certain kick against his hand. He smiled, amazed at the feeling. "Does that hurt?" he asked in wonder.

"Only when she kicks hard under my ribs," Ruth said. She smiled at Harry, feeling safe for the first time in months, just due to his presence.

"Is she all right? I mean…"

"Yes," Ruth said. "I am having checkups and she's fine."

"Good," Harry said. "And how are you?"

"You've already asked that," she said lightly. "I'm fine. Why are you here Harry?" She smiled again at him. "Not that I'm not pleased to see you. God, I am, but… has something happened?"

_Had something happened?_ He thought to himself. Yes, something had happened. "I have something for you," he said. He put his hand into his pocket and found her passport. He handed it to her and she took it, flipping it open to see her photograph and her real name there. She froze, a rush of emotions going over her. Joy, fear, relief.

"I'm… free?"

"Yes," he said. "Malcolm's a genius, but yes. You're free." Ruth let out a massive sigh of relief as two tears fell down her cheeks.

"Oh God," she said, gasping for breath. "I never thought… I thought… I'd never be able to go home, and…" The tears were flowing freely down her face and Harry pulled her close to him, before he could even think about it. She sobbed silently into his shirt as he stroked her back and murmured soothing words to her. He never wanted to let her go. Either of them, he reminded himself. He didn't want to let either of them out of his sight.


	3. Chapter 3

When her tears had dried, she pulled away from him, embarrassed at such emotion. "Sorry," she said, wiping her face.

"Don't worry," he said.

"There's an ultrasound on the fridge," she said. "If you want to see it?"

"If I want to see it?" he asked bewildered. "Why wouldn't I?" As if following on from that thought, he walked into the tiny kitchenette and saw the picture, stuck on the fridge. It was a grey blurred picture, but it represented their baby, their child. He smiled at the image as Ruth walked behind him. "You think I don't want to be involved?" Harry asked. "With our baby?"

"Harry, I don't know," she said. "I mean, I hope you'd want to be a father to her, but… we've been out on a date once. We've slept together once. That's all. I wouldn't blame you, if you…"

"No," he said, eyes burning as he instantly cut off her thought. "I will be there. I hate the fact that you've already been through so much alone."

She smiled at him. "You're a good man." She squeezed his hand tightly. "It might take a while for me to get back to London though."

"Why?" Harry asked, smiling nonetheless that she intended to come back home. He hadn't even asked, and she was intending to come back to London. The thought made him giddy with happiness.

"I can't fly," she said. "I'm too pregnant."

"Oh," he said.

"You're smiling," she said, smiling herself at the look on his face.

"I've wanted to see you for so long," he said. "And now you're here. Or I'm here. I've missed you."

"I've missed you too," she said. "How long have you got before you have to be back at work?"

"I have time," he said, avoiding the question.

"Okay," she said. Silence spread out between them and they were both beginning to get a little uncomfortable. Then Ruth's phone rang, making them both jump. "It'll be work," she said, as she picked up the phone. She spoke in a fluent stream of French and he listened to the beautiful lilt of her voice with a smile. His intellectual brain wasn't functioning properly yet, so he could only understand one word in three, but he still loved listening to her.

"D'accord. Au revoir." She put the phone down and looked at him.

"Should you be elsewhere?" he said softly.

"Yes," she said. "But I'm not going to leave."

"Good," he said. His eyes were drawn to her stomach again. "I don't really know what to say to you," he admitted.

"Mm," she said. "I don't either. Tea?"

"Yes, that sounds like a good idea," he said, smiling at her. "I can make it?"

"No don't bother," she said, wanting to do something with her hands. She came back a few minutes later and gave him his tea, sweet he noticed.

"Can I ask a… well, an uncomfortable question?" Harry asked, his hand wrapped around the mug of tea.

"You can ask," she said, warily.

"Why did you decided to keep the baby?" he asked. "I'm sure it would have been easier if you'd had an abortion."

"Yes, I'm sure it would have been," her voice going cold. He suddenly realised what his question had sounded like, and he hastily corrected her.

"I'm not saying I would have preferred that," he said, voice deep and sure. "I'm not."

"Yeah," she said lowly. "I'm sure the inconvenience of another child for you is just what you wanted," she added sarcastically.

"Ruth, shut up for a minute," he said forcefully. She was surprised by his tone, so she did close her mouth and listen. "I am incredibly surprised to find you pregnant," he said. "I did not say I'm not happy, I did not say I wouldn't be there for you and the baby, because I will be." She smiled at that, her eyes sparkling. "I was asking, why, when you were alone and far away from home… Did you not even think about it?"

"Yeah, I did," she said. "I was in Bordeaux when I found out I was pregnant. It was bloody inconvenient," she added and he smiled. I thought about having an abortion in a very… distant way. If I was pregnant, I'd have to settle down somewhere. I couldn't travel as much as I liked to make sure no one knew where I was. An abortion would have got rid of the problem." She swallowed the lump in her throat and her eyes filled with unexpected tears. "But, I couldn't get rid of something that was half you and half me. And it wasn't only my choice to make. If I'd got rid of it, of her, and I hadn't even asked what you wanted to do… I couldn't do it. And, unexpected though it was, I wanted her." She smiled happily. "I do want her."

"I want her too," he said.

"You've only known about her for half an hour," Ruth said rationally.

"It doesn't matter," he said. "I want you both," he added in a very quiet voice. She looked at him for a long moment, and saw that he meant it.

"I can't rush things," she said. "Between us I mean. It isn't just my life I'd be ruining if things went wrong." Her palms spread over her stomach in illustration.

He resisted the impulse to say that nothing would go wrong between them. His first marriage had at least taught him that much. "Then we won't rush anything," he said. Then he looked at her bump. "With one rather large exception."

"Mm," she said. She smiled yet again and then froze as Harry's lips covered hers. It was a soft, gentle, beautiful kiss, that made her heart race. Their lips pressed against each other, and they fit together just as well as they had the last time they'd kissed. When he released her from the embrace it took several moments for her to realise where she was. Harry jerked, putting his hand on her stomach again. He'd felt the baby kicking and he couldn't take his palm away. She pressed her own hand over his.

* * *

**Thank you for the reviews so far. This is probably going to be unrealistic fluff!**


	4. Chapter 4

"You know you don't have to come back to London," he said. It hurt him to say the words, but he knew he had to.

"I do," she said surely. "I do, because I have to go home."

"I'm glad you said that," he said with a smile.

"What if I wanted to stay here?" she asked. "What would you do?"

"Become a frequent flyer," he said, making her smile. "Seriously, it would be awful for me. Being away from you, and the little one. But I wouldn't want to do anything which would make you unhappy." _Even though it would kill me_, he added to himself.

"I'm going home Harry," she said. "What happened to my house? It's sold right?"

"Not really," he said. "I bought it."

"You did what?!"

"I couldn't see all of your things, your house just go. Vanish. So Malcolm set up an account for me which no one can find, and I bought it."

"But… I've been living off of the money from the sale," she said. "So I've been spending your money?"

"Ruth, it's only money," he said.

"But still, you shouldn't have done that," she said. It seemed too personal, that while she'd been away in exile, she'd been spending Harry's money.

"I absolutely should have," he said firmly. "And I don't regret it. Had I known you were pregnant, I'd have done it even faster."

"I can't argue with you can I?" she said.

"No."

She smiled. "I should get to work. Hand in my notice. It's only been a temporary job anyway."

"How long before we can leave?" he asked. "I need to know before I book train tickets."

"Today," she said. "I've made sure that I have everything ready, if I need to leave on a moments notice." She left the room, and came back with a holdall, clearly packed and ready to go.

"I'm sorry you've had to live like this," he said honestly.

"Well, not any longer," she said, smiling. "I just need to say goodbye to some people. I should go."

"Okay," he said. She picked up her keys and looked at Harry for a long moment. "Is it okay if I stay here, while you're leaving your job?"

"Of course," she said. She walked over to him and kissed him deeply. Harry cradled her face as her tongue flicked against his lips. He groaned with want, trying to control himself. When they parted, she was smiling. "I'll see you in a bit," she said.

Harry nodded and watched as she left. When he was alone, he picked up the phone and dialed. He had a lot of organising to do.

* * *

They were sat in an empty train carriage, Ruth still in the dark about what was going on. "Where are we going?" she asked.

"Vienna."

"Why?"

He looked around the train carriage as if it were obvious. "Because you can't fly," he said.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but Vienna is further away from London than Prague. We're going in the wrong direction."

"No, you're right," he said. "There's nothing wrong with your geography. But seeing as we have to take the train, as opposed to flying, I thought we could make a few stops along the way.

"Even though Vienna is in the opposite direction?" she asked, smiling.

"Yes," he said. "When's the baby due?"

"June 1st," she said, thrown by the change in subject. "Why?"

"I want to know how much time we have, before we have to be safely back in London," he said. "So I can plan things."

"Are we having our own grand tour?" she asked, her voice soft.

"Something like that," he agreed. "I can't imagine the last few weeks and months have been fun for you, so I'm going to treat you."

She put her head against his shoulder as he wrapped his arms around her.

"Thank you," she said. "You know I don't have to be in London when the baby comes," she said.

"What, so you're suggesting my child is born in France? Or Germany? Have you had a recent blow to the head?"

Ruth laughed into his shirt. "God forbid," she said. He stroked her hair, smiling. "So what are we going to Vienna for?"

"It's a surprise," he said.

"Oh come on," she said. "We've got a couple of hours on the train. Give me a hint."

He took her hand in his and laced their fingers together. Their hands slowly touched one another in a very sensual manner. For several long moments neither of them spoke, just enjoying the touch. "So why Vienna?"

"What would you most want to do there?" he asked. She spent about five minutes in silent contemplation.

"The opera," she said. "I think the Viennese opera."

"I knew you'd guess," he said, squeezing her hand.

"I can't go," she said suddenly. "I don't have a dress," she said with disappointment, kicking her holdall lightly. "It's all practical boring stuff."

"There'll be a dress waiting for you at the hotel," he said. "And a tux for me too."

"Really?" she asked, her face blooming into a smile.

"Yes," he said.  
"Oh, you're wonderful," she said. In that moment she found herself falling in love with him all over again.

* * *

**Next station, fluff central!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you for the great reviews so far. Hope this lives up to expectations.**

* * *

Ruth opened the door to their hotel suite and felt her face freeze. "Harry, its huge!" It was. There was a massive king size bed, and a large bathroom with both a shower and a free standing bath. "This must have cost you a fortune."

"Forget about the money," he said. "I want to treat you. Us, I should say." She smiled and then caught sight of two garment bags hanging in the open wardrobe. She took them out and unzipped them. The first was Harry's suit, the second was her dress.

"I hope I don't look like an elephant," she said.

"You'll look beautiful," he said, making her smile at the compliment.

"How long before the opera?"

Harry looked at his watch. "About an hour."

"Can I monopolise the bathroom? I want a shower, and I want to… dress up properly."

"Okay," he said. He smiled and then sighed with pleasure as she kissed him. Her palms ended up resting on his chest, his hands on the small of her back. His hands twitched, itching to go lower but he resisted the urge.

"I'll go and have a shower then." He watched her go and smiled at her. He stayed perfectly still until he heard the water spray in the bathroom. The knowledge that Ruth was naked in the adjoining room was doing things to him. He sat down on the edge of the bed and curled his hands into fists so he wouldn't succumb to the urge to burst into the bathroom. It surprised him by how much the desire for her was there, even after six months apart. He shook his head and started to get changed.

* * *

Ruth got herself into the black dress, which was absolutely stunning, she had to admit. And it fit her as well, including the bump. Unfortunately she couldn't reach the zip and she knew she'd have to ask Harry for help.

"Harry, can you give me a hand?" she called out.

"Yeah, sure," he said. He opened the bathroom door and paused, seeing her wrapped in black satin, the back of it open showing her beautiful pale skin.

"I can't get the zip up," she said.

"Oh," he said. He pulled the zip up, his fingers resting on the nape of her neck. He couldn't quite seem to let her go, and the tension was almost crackling in the air between them. She turned and then dropped her eyes, looking him over.

"You scrub up very well," she said quietly. In fact he took her breath away, pristine white shirt, black jacket and bow tie.

"You look beautiful," he said. "Shall we go?"

"Yes, lets." She linked her arm through his and they left the hotel suite, to go to the Opera. In Vienna. Ruth couldn't believe how her life had changed in only a few short days.

* * *

Several hours later found them on the roof of their hotel, looking over the city as they snuggled into each other. About an hour ago Harry had given her his jacket, and she was very warm and comfortable. "That was a wonderful performance," Ruth said, curling into his chest.

"Yes it was," he said, stroking her hair. "And the most beautiful woman in the room was on my arm."

"Flattery will get you everywhere," she said. In a moment of impulse, she kissed the hollow of his throat. "Thank you for tonight."

"You're welcome," he said, his voice low and seductive. Ruth could feel things escalating and she cleared her throat to try and change the subject.

"Have you thought of any names yet?" Ruth asked.

"I can honestly say no," he said. "It's been a bit sudden for me and I haven't thought of any names at all." His hand moved to her bump protectively and she smiled.

"Persephone?"

"No, I want a pronounceable name for our child."

"Guinevere?"

"Ruth, do you hate her?"

"Oh, Guinevere's nice!" she argued. "You could shorten it to Gwen."

"It's going to be a boy anyway," Harry said. She shuffled to look at him. "Well, you've been calling the baby "her" for six and a half months, its bound to be a boy."

"Oh really?" she asked.

"Of course," he said. "I bet you it's a boy."

"Are you sure?"

"Positively."

"I have a plan then," she said. "If it's a girl, I'll name her. If it's a boy, you can name him."

"Oh," he said in surprise. "Well…"

"I thought you were sure," she teased.

"But that's really unfair. You know you're safe with me. Boys names are less elaborate, and then you'll go ahead and name her something with five syllables and two dozen letters."

"If you're sure it's a boy, what does it matter?" she said. "It'll be in your hands anyway."

"Fine," he agreed. "But if it happens to be a girl, I have to be able to pronounce her name. Fair enough?"

"Agreed," she said. She laughed lightly as he stroked her hair. "So what boys names do you like?"

"Well if you're going with Guinevere, I want Arthur," he said. She laughed and wrapped her arms around him.

They were quiet for some time until they heard a distant clock chime the hour. Two in the morning. "We should probably go to bed," he said.

"I did notice, that there's only one bed in our room," she said. "I… um…"

"Don't worry," he said, holding her hand gently. "I'm not… expecting anything."

"I know we've already slept together," she said. "Obviously," she added at her large bump. "But, I just feel…"

"You don't have to explain," he said. "I booked the hotel last minute, and it was the only room left."

"Okay," she said. "I don't want…" she looked very uncomfortable and Harry squeezed her hand tightly. "I don't want to have sex while I'm pregnant. It'd just… make me feel uncomfortable."

"Ruth, I'd never push you into anything," he said.

"It's not that I don't want to sleep with you," she said. "I do. I just…" He shut her up, simply by putting his lips to hers, in a gentle reassuring kiss. He rested his forehead against hers and smiled.

"Come on. Lets get some sleep," he said softly.

"Yes."

* * *

Ruth had fallen asleep almost as soon as her head hit the pillow. Harry didn't. The king sized bed was so big that they could easily not touch, but he still found her irresistible. She looked so beautiful, her face relaxed in sleep and her hair tousled and the roundness of their child clear under the bed sheets. After about ten minutes of contemplation, he reached out for her, placing a palm on her bump, gently so he wouldn't wake her.

"Hi little one," he whispered. "So I didn't know about you. You were very much a surprise. A good one though," he assured the baby. "Look, I'm going to be honest here. I'm not a great father. I've got two children already, and I must say I'm... quite a disappointment to them. I hope I won't be to you."

There was a slight kick just to the left of his hand from the baby and he moved his palm to cover it, smiling. "I'm good with babies and toddlers," he continued. "It's when my kids get a voice, that's when I have trouble. But, I know your mother too, and she'll give me a slap if I ever mistreat you, you know that? Your mum's a brave, courageous and fiercely intelligent woman. You're so lucky to have her." He smiled at the mental image of Ruth cradling their baby. "I want to learn from my mistakes though. So I'm going to be the best father I can be to you. Okay. Just promise me, you'll give me a nudge in the right direction." There was a sudden kick and he smiled. "Thanks. Goodnight little one." He curled up in the bed sheets and closed his eyes, feeling at peace and very happy.

* * *

**More soon.**


	6. Chapter 6

**I had a host of technical problems yesterday, but things are looking a little better today. So, a new day and a new chapter.**

* * *

They were sat in a café just by St Stephens Cathedral. "You know, I never thought I'd miss coffee," she said as she poured a generous serving of cream on her apple pie.

"Just a few more weeks," Harry said.

"No it's not," she said. "You can't have coffee when you're breastfeeding," she said.

"I'm sure a tiny bit wouldn't hurt," he said.

"No, it probably wouldn't," she said. "But I want to do all the things I can do to be a good mother."

"You'll be a great mother," he said, grasping her hand across the table. "I know it."

She smiled with happiness as his fingers slid over her hand gently. "Thanks." With her free hand she kept eating her dessert, and he watched with silent amazement at the amount she'd eaten. Ruth read the look in his face.

"Come on, I'm eating for two," she said.

"Fair enough," he said. "Where do you want to go next?"

"I don't mind," she said. "I think we should probably head West though. Towards home."

"Mm, maybe," he said.

"Well, I daresay you have plans for some stops along the way. So going home might take weeks."

"Of course I do," he said. She grinned happily. "Another night here though?"

"Yeah," she said. "I enjoy walking around a foreign strange city with you."

"So do I," he said.

"You know, it's so terribly romantic," she said. Ruth finished her dessert and dropped her spoon on the plate as Harry's lips twitched.

"What?"

"You have a bit of cream there," he said, pointing to her face. She lifted her hand to get rid of it, but Harry grabbed it, to still it. Instead he leaned close to her and pressed his lips against the corner of her mouth. His tongue flicking against her delightfully. She shivered with pleasure.

"That feels good," she whispered, her breath rushing over his lips. He smiled and then kissed her softly. "You're so good at that." He smiled as he drew back, still holding her hands. "I've missed that."

"So have I," he said.

"How have things been in London?"

"Busy," he said. "I've been working quite a bit. Actually, I'm hardly ever home. I thought… if I threw myself into work, then I wouldn't miss you so much."

"Did it work?" she asked.

"No," he said. "But it was better than rattling around my big empty house on my own." He sighed heavily. "I did miss you. Badly. Everyday."

"So did I," she said. "I always wondered what you'd do if you knew about the baby. Now I know." He kissed her again. "So, who's the new analyst?" she asked.

"Connie James."

"Really?"

"Why?" he asked, alert to something in her tone.

"She was pushed out of the service years ago," Ruth said. "Did you never look into why?"

"What do you know, that I don't?" he asked, voice going deeper and more… grid like.

"I don't trust her."

"You've never met her."

"I still don't trust her," Ruth said. "There is something about her…"

"I know," Harry agreed. "I think she should probably be in prison. I don't like the fact that she was free, because we'd never been able to prove anything against her. I'm sure she's working for China, but she's clever. I've never seen anything to suggest it, but I'm keeping a close eye on her.

"From Vienna?" she said slyly.

"Well, I have another analyst watching over her too, from section C."

"It's not China," Ruth said after a moment. "Russia. I think it's Russia."

"How do you know that?" he asked. "You haven't been on the grid in seven months."

"I don't know it," she said. "I'm guessing. I think it's probably an accurate guess though."

"How?"

"All right," she said. "When I worked at Thames House, I went through an awful lot of information every day. I only gave you the weekly reports, and what was relevant to the operations we were working on. I went through about five times that. I pick up on things, that's why I'm good at what I do."

"True," he said. "I'll send a message to the grid. How did we end up talking about work?"

"Isn't it what we do best?" she said softly.

"I suppose so," he said. "Lets change the subject."

"Okay," she said. She squeezed his hand tightly and they moved on to more pleasant things.

* * *

Ruth awoke early the next morning to find Harry staring out of the window of their hotel room. He was undressed, wearing only a pair of boxer shorts and she found herself admiring his body. She remembered how it felt to run her hands over his chest, to brush her lips over his skin as he stroked her hair. She swallowed uncomfortably, and wondered exactly why she'd said she didn't want to sleep with him until the baby came. He was just so attractive and she was curling her toes with remembered passion.

There was a powerful kick under her ribs, as if reminding her that she had another presence with her and she gasped. The noise made Harry turn around and smile at her. "You're awake."

"Mm," she said. "You look good." He looked down at himself and then shrugged, before getting back into bed next to her. "Are you okay?"

"Yes," he said. The truth was he'd woken up and felt a burning desire for her. So he'd got up, before he could act on it, and do something she might not be comfortable with.

"I'm a fool," Ruth said, curling into his shoulder.

"Why?"

"Because I want you," she said simply. "Maybe it's my hormones, but right now I can't remember why I wanted to wait."

He turned to her and kissed her softly and sweetly. "I can wait," he said. "I don't need sex. I just need you."

"You might be able to wait," she said, eyes bright. "I don't know if I can."  
He pulled her close, kissing her deeply as he held her. She jerked slightly as his foot touched her calf. His feet were cold against her warm flesh but she didn't pull away. "You wanted to wait," he whispered against her lips. "So, we'll wait."

"I can't change my mind?" she asked.

"Oh Ruth, you're going to kill me," he said. He kissed her neck gently, tongue flicking out over her skin.

"Oh…" she moaned. "Oh, that's good…" She ran her hands through his hair, clutching him close as his lips, tongue and teeth teased her. His hand found her breast and cradled it gently.

"Mm," he murmured. His thumb stroked her nipple through the pyjama shirt she wore and she felt her skin tingling in response.

"Harry…"

"What?"

Instead of saying anything she just moaned with satisfaction and he laughed. "Oh, don't shave," she said, his stubble was deliciously sensitive on her skin. She closed her eyes in bliss as he continued to kiss her and then she shrugged him off. She looked at him and then she pulled her pyjama top off.

"Ruth…"

"Yes?" she said. He cradled her breasts, looking deeply into her eyes as he did so. "Gently," she said.

"They're fuller than last time," he said gently.

"Breasts do that with pregnancy," she whispered, eyes sparkling. He kissed her deeply and then got up, much to her surprise. "What? Are you just… stopping?"

"Yes," he said. "Because you asked me to wait... us to wait until the baby was born. And when you asked, you weren't suffering from your pregnancy hormones and you were fully awake."

"Mm," she agreed. "And I hadn't been treated to a view of your naked chest either. Trust you to do the "right" thing," she said with a sigh, covering her body up with the sheets. "Where are we going today then?"

"Salzburg," he said.


	7. Chapter 7

"This is so beautiful," Ruth said. They were in the grounds of Hellbrunn Palace and Ruth was thoroughly enjoying herself. It was early in the evening as the train had taken a while to bring them here, and the sun was setting in a glorious pink behind the palace. It was a perfect evening.

"Harry, thank you," she said, squeezing his hand.

"For what?"

"For trying to make this our own grand tour. For… being you." He pulled her into his arms, her back against his chest and kissed the top of her head.

"I wanted to ask you something," she said.

"Go on."

"How does it feel to be a knight of the realm?" He sighed with a smile and she laughed. "You really thought I wouldn't find out?"

"Of course you would," he said resigned.

"Why didn't you tell me?" she asked, turning to face him.

"Because it's not anything I think about," he said honestly. "It doesn't affect my life."

"Really? You're **_Sir_** Harry now," she said, smiling. "It must have some benefits."

"Er, no," he said. "It gave me a few hours off one afternoon to go to the palace. Otherwise, no."

"You've never used it to get your way?"

"No."

"Well, you should know that it's a… rather an attractive quality," she said.

"Oh really?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

"The fact that I have a knight of the realm on my arm? Yes," she said. He kissed her deeply and Ruth moaned into his mouth as his arms tightened around her body. Then she squealed in surprise as they were suddenly deluged in cold water. She broke away from him and looked around, seeing the famed trick fountains, pouring water over the pair of them. Harry smiled at her through the haze of water droplets, thinking that she looked so perfect. Her face surprised, but happy, her eyes bright, a smile on her lips and her hair now drenched in a dark tangle around her shoulders.

"You look perfect," he said, just loud enough to be heard over the noise of the fountain. Her face softened into an almost sensual smile and she kissed him, her large stomach only getting in the way slightly as he put his hands on her hips, pulling her close.

"We're getting soaked," she whispered.

"I don't care." He kept kissing her until the fountain stopped spraying water over them. "I love you."

Her eyes opened in slight surprise and then she smiled. "I know." She pressed her lips to his very lightly. "I love you too." He sighed with relief and kissed her again, tongue licking deliciously over her lips.

"I think… we should go back to the hotel," Ruth said, her fingers on the buttons of his shirt. "We need a room."

He paused for a moment. "Yes," he said. "I think that'd be… a good idea." Ruth smiled, her eyes alight with expectation and eagerness as she held his hand and they left, getting soaked by another fountain as they walked, happy and very much in love.

* * *

Ruth awoke first the next morning, her body feeling very soft. She turned to her right and saw Harry sleeping, which made her smile. She stroked his hair lightly, not enough to disturb him and then got out of bed, wrapping a bed sheet around herself. She looked at the floor and felt her face split into a wide smile.

Their wet clothes were in piles on the floor and she grinned. They hadn't managed to dry themselves off before tumbling into bed with each other, and they were still forming wet patches on the carpet. She picked them up and hung them up over a radiator to dry, all the while smiling. She looked out of the window and watched the rain pour over the city in sheets.

"Yeah, I know you're there too," she said at a small nudge under her ribs. But she remembered the night before, with a glow inside her. They'd made love slowly and tenderly, each touch measured, each kiss breathtaking. Her skin was still tingling from where he'd touched her and she had what felt like a permanent smile on her face. Moving to look in the mirror she saw two red marks on her neck. She covered them with her hand, remembering his lips on her sensitive flesh.

"Are you okay?" a croaky voice asked from the bed. She turned, smiling.

"Very," she said. "Who was I kidding? We were never going to last three months before sleeping together were we?"

"It seems not," he said, grinning. "Come back to bed." She nodded, and did, curling up next to him. "How about we order room service and spend the day in bed."

"Some would say you have a one track mind," she teased, her palm drifting across his chest.

"After last night, do you blame me?" he said. "And this morning."

"It felt so good," she said. "It was… different than last time."

"Yes," he agreed. The first time they'd slept together had been at Havensworth, and it had been frantic, quick and a complete blur of sensation. After years of denying themselves, they'd exploded in a burst of desperate passion, which had been over in mere minutes. At the time, they'd both thought there would be more opportunities for them to be together and explore every delight they had to offer to each other.

But then Cotterdam had happened. And she'd had to leave. So last night every touch had been slow and treasured. Because they'd known it could be pulled away at any moment. "What do you want for breakfast?" he asked, picking up the phone.

"Anything," she said. "But a large portion. We burnt off quite a lot of energy last night." He kissed her again, and then dialled through to reception. She toyed with the fine hairs on his chest while he spoke German to the receptionist. She wasn't listening to what he was saying, instead admiring her lovers body. By the time he put the phone down her hand was drifting southwards.

"Ruth…"

"Hm?"

"You might want to keep your hands to yourself," he said. Then he gasped as her fingers wrapped around his length.

"Why?" she asked, her voice teasing.

"Because room service are going to be knocking on the door in the next fifteen minutes," he said, feeling all the blood in his body rush southwards.

"Oh well," she whispered. "If we have fifteen minutes…" He didn't say anything, because if he was being perfectly honest he didn't want her to stop. Her touch on him was far too exquisite.

* * *

When room service knocked on their door, they were both in a semi state of respectability. Well, they weren't writhing under the bed sheets at any rate, and they were covered up in the hotels dressing gowns when Harry opened the door. A large trolley was wheeled into the room and the smell of coffee made Ruth's stomach rumble. She sat up in bed as Harry tipped the waiter and closed the door, bringing her some coffee. She raised her eyebrows at him as she wrapped her hands around the cup.

"It's decaf," he said to her silent question. She sipped it and then sighed with pleasure.

"Oh that's so good!" she said. "That's the best decaf I've ever tasted. Are you sure it's not coffee coffee?"

"Yeah, when I checked in yesterday I had someone hunt down the best decaf for you."

"Thank you," she said, as Harry brought their breakfasts on a tray to the bed, before crawling in next to her. He kissed her briefly before starting to eat the selection of cold meats on a platter. As he ate, his foot started to slide up her inner thigh. "We're not going to get out of bed today are we?" she asked with a surprisingly steady voice.

He smiled. "No."

* * *

**Okay, I couldn't resist. I had intended for them to hold out, but no, it just wasn't happening that way.**


	8. Chapter 8

The days passed into slow and enjoyable weeks. They travelled leisurely, towards London, passing through Munich, Zurich, Strasbourg, Frankfurt, Dusseldorf, and ending up in Amsterdam. Harry hadn't wanted to go to Berlin. He'd said it brought up bad memories, and she didn't pry. Stirring up the past wouldn't do anyone any good, and they both knew that once they were back in London, she could easily find out the information about Harry in the Cold War if she wished to. She didn't want to, because it wasn't really any of her business. It was in his past, way before she'd even met him, so she had no desire to go digging.

Ruth's bump was growing, seemingly by the day. She wasn't due for another five weeks, but she was beginning to get uncomfortable. She wanted to be in England for the birth of their child, and her time was getting near. But she also knew perfectly well that Harry had only one more stop on the agenda. Paris. She wanted to go there, badly. The last time she'd been through the city, she'd been alone, frightened and had just left her home. It would be good to return under better circumstances.

She awoke to the sound of the shower running, and an empty bed next to her. She would dearly love to join Harry in the shower, but she couldn't. She was far too pregnant, and they wouldn't both fit. After the baby was born, sharing a shower with Harry was on the top of her list of things to do. She would enjoy that.

The shower stopped running and she smiled as Harry came back into the room, stark naked and wet, droplets of water running down his body. She bit her bottom lip, feeling the heat in her cheeks. He looked at her and smiled, as if reading his mind.

"After last night, how can you still want more?" he asked.

"Well, if you insist on walking around our hotel room stark naked, can you blame me?" He smiled as he put his watch on. He saw the time and frowned.

"We really don't have time."

"When's our train?"

"Soon." She sighed and swung her legs out of bed, needing to get dressed.

"All right," she groaned. "I'll just have to wait until we get to Paris to have you won't I?" Harry stopped moving and looked at her, her blue eyed gaze starting to make him change his mind.

"No, no," he said to himself. "We have to make this train."

"Okay," she said, smiling. "If that's what you want?"

"That innocent tone of voice is highly distracting." She laughed at that before slipping a jumper on. It had been loose, just a week ago, but now it was uncomfortably tight.

"I need more clothes," she said. "I think I've grown another size overnight."

"We'll pick some up later today," he said. She nodded and he watched her go into the bathroom, his eyes on her shapely legs. He wanted her badly. But there wasn't time, and he knew it. They really should be going back to London soon, but he couldn't resist the lure of Paris with Ruth. Not when it was so very close.

* * *

"You know I've dreamed of being here with you," he said as they sat outside Notre Dame.

"I dreamed of the ice cream," Ruth said, licking the sweetness off of her fingers where it had dripped from the cone. They were silent while she finished off the ice crem, and then she leaned back against his chest. "We have to go home don't we?" she asked.

"Yes," he said reluctantly.

"I overheard that call last night," she said softly, just loud enough to be heard over the tourists milling around.

"Yeah," he said shortly. "I'm needed on the grid. I've taken quite a bit of holiday. More than I should have. Especially as I'll be on paternity leave in a few weeks."

"You've given MI5 your life," she said softly. "What's a few weeks?"

"I'm afraid it's not seen like that," he said. "I have to go back. And so do you. The little one has to be born British I'm afraid."

"That really bothers you doesn't it?" she asked.

"How can the head of counter terrorism for the British Isles have a child that's born a French citizen?"

"She wouldn't be," Ruth said. "She isn't a French citizen because of where she's born. I had a look at the laws, and it changed fifteen years ago. She, or he will be British, I assure you."

"Good," he said. He kissed her lips briefly and Ruth looked over the Seine.

"I feel a lot more at ease than the last time I was by this river," she said."

"What happened?"

"Nothing," she said. "I was just frightened. I'd just left Britain, I didn't know I was pregnant and I was scared I'd be caught. Given that I was supposed to have drowned."

"I didn't like that," he said, his voice suddenly solemn. "I had to identify your body. It wasn't enjoyable."

"You knew it wasn't me, before you went there," she said.

"No, I _hoped_ it wasn't you," he said. "I didn't know what had happened to you in the last twelve hours. For all I knew, it could have been."

"So… a part of you thought it was me?" she asked.

"Yes," he said. "And I had to fake devastation when I saw you."

"Who was it? That you used for my body."

"An immigrant," he said. "But she did have a resemblance to you. She was your height, your fair skin and had almost your hair. It wasn't quite your colour, but I'm sure I'm the only one who noticed that." She smiled at him, feeling touched, despite the morbid subject matter.

"Where next?" she asked, wanting to think of more pleasant things.

"The Eiffel Tower?"

"Sounds good," she said. "But I don't want to go up it. I'd like to sit and watch it light up."

"Okay," he said. "We'll sit in the champ de mars, and watch the sun set, and the tower sparkle. Will that do?"

"Sounds perfect."

* * *

**Thank you for the reviews so far. I'm sure the baby will be born quite soon now.**


	9. Chapter 9

Ruth woke, but she didn't want to. She wanted to sleep for the next year or so. Her happy bubble of paradise with Harry was bursting, and she didn't want it to. They were going home today. The euro star, and then three hours and they'd be in London. Home. She wanted to go home, but she also didn't want to leave her dream world. It'd been so nice for these last few weeks.

But she had to go home, have her baby and get back to normal in that order. Although "normal" would now have a screaming baby too. As if responding to her very thought, the child kicked her hard and she gasped.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah," she said. "That was a… hard one," she said, palm over her bump.

"He's going to be a rugby player then?"

"Not football?"

"No, our son will have class," he said.

"What boys names have you come up with?" she asked softly.

"I like Benjamin," he said slowly.

"For your brother?" she asked.

"Well, yes," he said. "But I do like the name as well."

"Benjamin's good," she said. "Ben," she said, as if trying it on for size. "Mm."

"What about your half of the bargain?" he asked. "Girls names."

"I like Aurora, but I have a feeling you won't," she said.

"Yes, that's right," he said. "I don't."

"Okay," she said. "I was thinking Lily?"

"That's great," he said. "Lily… what are we doing for the last name?"

"Pearce," she said as if it were obvious.

"Are you sure?" he asked, but she didn't answer, because the wide grin on his face made it clear that was exactly what he wanted. He kissed her deeply and she laughed happily.

"I love you," she said.

"I love you too," he said. "And we have to get up, because we have a train to catch."

She groaned, but moved all the same. When she was sitting up she felt an uncomfortable clenching around her bump. It wasn't painful, but it was powerful. After a few moments, the feeling faded but she waited anyway, waiting for something to happen. Anything. Nothing did.

"Are you looking forward to going home?" Harry asked.

Ruth gave herself a mental shake. "Yes. It feels like the end of the honeymoon though," she said.

"We're not married," he pointed out.

"No, but it's been a really good holiday."

"Yeah," he said. "It has."

* * *

They were on the train and Ruth was dozing lightly as Harry watched her, admiring the curve of her cheek. She really was a beautiful woman. Ruth moaned a little in her sleep, just a quiet noise and a frown on her forehead as her hands wrapped around her stomach. He watched, but after a moment she relaxed back into sleep. He waited and waited, but nothing happened. He was panicking over nothing he decided. Of course the baby wasn't coming now. That was just his worry talking.

About twenty minutes later, she woke and smiled at him. "Were you watching me sleep?" she asked.

"Yes," he said, completely unashamed. She smiled and then looked around the darkness in confusion.

"We're in the channel tunnel," he said.

"Oh." She sat up, rubbing her face into alertness. "Nearly home then."

"Yes." Her face suddenly creased into lines of pain and he watched with worry.

"Ruth?" She said nothing, just put her hands on the top of her bump, concentrating. "Ruth, is the baby coming?" he asked quietly.

"I don't know," she said. "It might be. It'll be hours yet anyway."

"That's not exactly comforting," he said. She looked at her watch and shrugged.

"The contractions are far apart anyway," she said. "We'll be in London in an hour."

"How are you so calm?!" he asked in astonishment.

"There's nothing I can do about it," she said. "I can't stop it, the baby will come when it's ready."

Harry suddenly had a nagging suspicion at the back of his mind. "Were you… feeling contractions when we were in Paris?"

"I think I probably was," she admitted.

"Why on earth didn't you say anything?!"

"Because I've never been in labour before," she said. "I wasn't sure they were contractions. And I wanted to go home."

"Ruth…"

"Don't," she said. "Just don't." She looked at him and saw how worried he was. "I'm going to be fine. We'll take a taxi from St Pancras and go to the hospital.

"She's early," Harry said. "Too early."

"No, it's not too early," Ruth said. "It's three weeks early. She'll be fine."

"How do you know that?!"

"I had some spare time before you showed up," she said. "I've researched every stage of pregnancy, and all the horrible complications too. It's going to be okay." She leaned over the seat and kissed him briefly. "First babies are slow anyway." Harry breathed in deeply and she realised that he was more nervous than she was. "You've done this before, why are you so frightened?"

"Actually I haven't," he said. "Jane didn't want me around with Catherine and Graham. So I was sitting in the waiting room while they were born."

Ruth looked at him for a moment having absolutely nothing to say to that, then leaned her head against his shoulder, his arm wrapping around her out of reflex. They were silent for many minutes, watching the scenery as they emerged from the tunnel until she stiffened with another contraction. Harry looked at his watch.

"Eighteen minutes since the last one," he said, worry clear in his voice.

"See? Plenty of time," she said trying to reassure him.

"Shouldn't you be the one panicking and I should be the one comforting you?" Harry asked.

"I've been looking forward to this," she said with a smile. "I can deal with a bit of pain." He kissed the top of her head, wishing that London could somehow be a lot closer very quickly.

* * *

**More soon. I still haven't decided whether it's going to be a boy or a girl. Any votes?**


	10. Chapter 10

"Stop fussing! I'm fine!" It had taken about ninety minutes to finish the train journey and get to the hospital. Ruth's midwife had said that she was indeed in the early stages of labour, but it would be a while yet before the baby would make its appearance. And Harry had been fussing over her like mad, driving her up the wall.

"Please, do me a favour," she asked.

"Anything," he said instantly.

"Call in to the grid and catch up with everything. Spend an hour shouting at people and then come back."

"I'm driving you mad aren't I?" he asked. She nodded, smiling though.

"I love you, but if I have to put up with this for the next few hours, I'll end up killing you." He kissed the top of her head gently.

"Do you need anything?"

"Just stop worrying," she said. "That'll do me." He kissed her again, then left. Ruth closed her eyes, enjoying the peace for a few moments. Until her entire body cramped with pain for a while. She sighed as she relaxed, just waiting for her baby to make his or her appearance.

* * *

Harry did spend about forty minutes on the phone with the grid. Firstly, it stopped him from worrying about Ruth, and secondly he knew he was winding her up, by worrying so much. Ruth being in labour bothered him, and he didn't know why. After all, it wasn't unexpected. She was heavily pregnant, she was going to go into labour sooner or later. It was obvious. Maybe it was the lack of control that he didn't like. In this situation there was absolutely nothing he could do. He couldn't be in charge, and he could do nothing to help her. It was a strange feeling to him, so used to being the boss and having his words obeyed. Here he was beyond useless.

He sighed heavily, as he fully appreciated his complete uselessness, and he went back to Ruth's hospital room. Opening the door, he was amazed to see her curled on her side asleep. He sat on the chair next to her bed and she lifted her head. "I'm just dozing," she murmured.

"How are you so comfortable?" he asked.

"I'm not," she said without moving. "I'm… oh!" Still with her eyes shut, she curled around her belly in pain as a contraction went through her. Harry didn't say anything until she let out a breath with a sigh. "I am highly uncomfortable," she said honestly. "I feel like I want to explode, but I just have to put up with this until the baby's here. And from my research, it's only going to get worse."

"That's the woman I know and love," he said with a smile.

"What?"

"When in doubt, read about it." She smiled at him warmly. "So you haven't got to the stage where you want to castrate me yet?"

"No, not yet," she agreed. "I'll let you know when I'm there though."

"Fair enough."

* * *

Ruth moaned in pain as yet another contraction went through her. Harry held her hand, saying nothing. There was absolutely nothing he could do for her, and he knew it. That helplessness was not a comfortable feeling for him. And it had been more than fifteen hours now. Ruth was tired, and in a lot of pain.

"Please," she said quietly to the midwife. "Please tell me that I'm going to give birth soon! I'm exhausted."

"Yes," the midwife said, checking her over. "When you feel the next contraction, push."

"This better be over soon," she said, her hair sticking to her forehead, covered in sweat. "Please. Ah!"

"Push Ruth!" the midwife said. Harry winced as she squeezed his hand painfully.

"I can't do it anymore," she said quietly. "I'm too tired and it hurts too much."

"Of course you can," Harry said holding her hand. "You can do anything you set your mind to, and you know it." She couldn't reply, instead she groaned as the urge to push suddenly overwhelmed her.

"Hold on," the midwife said. "Don't push." The tone alarmed Harry immensely.

"What's wrong?"

"The cord's wrapped around the baby's neck," the midwife said. "Do not push!"

"Is it going to be okay?" she almost cried with a mixture of pain and desperation.

"Yeah, everything will be fine," the midwife said, concentrating on untangling the cord. A few moments later. "Right, push!"

Ruth let out a high pitched scream as she did so, her grip bruising Harry's hand. She pushed, and then suddenly relaxed, all the energy having gone out of her. Her eyes closed and she looked completely spent. Then she heard a tiny little cry and she smiled. Tiredly, but she smiled.

"It's a boy."

"A boy, really?" she asked, tired and very happy.

"Yes," the midwife said, wrapping the baby up in a blanket.

"Is he okay?" Harry asked, a massive smile on his face.

"He's fine," the midwife said, handing the crying baby to the new mother.

"No, he's perfect," Ruth said, her voice just audible over the crying baby, who now seemed to have found his lungs, getting louder with every passing second. Ruth rocked him, trying to get him to quieten, but that just seemed to make him even louder. "Oh come on sweetheart, I'm not that bad," Ruth cooed, still smiling.

"Try feeding him," the midwife said. Ruth attempted to undo her hospital gown, but couldn't with her arms carrying their son. Harry silently undid it for her, smiling at his new family. She put the baby to her breast, and he latched on greedily at once. The silence in the room was a relief to everyone. Harry leaned over Ruth and kissed her incredibly softly. Ruth smiled, her eyes bright blue and brimming with emotion. Harry cupped his sons head with his hand, feeling the light fuzz of hair against his skin.

"He's incredible," Harry said.

"Do we have a name?" the midwife asked kindly, clipboard in hand, clearly filling out the forms for the newborn.

"Benjamin?" Ruth asked, looking at Harry. He nodded slightly. "Benjamin Pearce," she told the midwife certainly with a smile.

"Welcome to the world little Benjamin," Harry said, voice hoarse with emotion.

* * *

**More soon! Thank you for the reviews so far. **


	11. Chapter 11

Harry sat, watching the woman he loved and his newborn son sleeping. The baby was in a cot by the bed, and Ruth had a lock of her hair over her face as she slept. They were both so beautiful. As much as he ached to pick the baby up, he didn't. Benjamin would wake, which would wake Ruth, which wasn't something feasible at four in the morning. By rights, Harry should be asleep too, but he couldn't quite bear to close his eyes. He might miss out on some of his sons first movements.

Ben was only a few hours old, and once he'd fully dried off from the birth, they'd both noticed that the fuzz on his head was ginger. Wet, it had been hard to tell, but Ruth had looked at the baby in confusion.

"Why is he ginger?" she'd asked. Then looked at Harry as if horror struck by a thought. "He is yours," she assured him. "I swear, I'm not lying!"

"Don't worry," Harry told her. "Pearce boys tend to be born ginger."

"Really?"

"Mm," Harry said. "I was apparently. It fades. Grahams went darker when he was about eighteen months old. I have pictures," he said quietly. Ruth noted the sadness in his voice.

"You should speak to him," Ruth said. "He's your son."

"He doesn't want to see me," Harry said. "And I don't blame him."

"Still," she said, her voice. "You should at least try. And does Catherine even know she has a new brother?"

"No," Harry said. "I didn't call her from Europe to mention that you were pregnant. I will tell her though."

"Good," Ruth said. "So his hair will change colour then?"

"I'd say it's very likely," Harry said. "But you never know. And he is such a handsome boy."

"Yeah," Ruth had said, smiling with pride. "He is."

In the present, Harry's attention was caught by the baby moving slightly. His hand wriggled a little and Harry smiled, looking at his beautiful blue eyes. Now that he was awake, he felt no qualms in picking his son up and cradling him.

"Good morning handsome," he said, rubbing his sons hair gently. "You're awake really early. I hope this isn't going to be a theme over the coming months, though it probably will be. That's what babies do isn't it?" Harry rocked him in the silence for long minutes, pleased that Ben wasn't crying and that he seemed to still have the knack for taking care of babies. After about fifteen minutes he began fussing and no matter what Harry did, the baby wouldn't settle.

"He needs feeding," Ruth said from the bed, her eyes still shut.

"How can you tell?" he asked in wonder. "You didn't even look at him, and you've never had a child before."

"I can tell because my breasts feel uncomfortably full with milk," she said, smiling at Harry. "Give him here." Harry did and watched with a deep happiness as she nursed their son. When Ben had had his fill, his head rested against his mothers chest, both of them tired.

"I'll put him down," Harry said, taking the child out of her unresistant grasp. He did, smiling the entire time.

* * *

"Okay, if you'd just like to sign there, you are both free to go," the nurse said with a smile.

"Go where?" Ruth said, the thought suddenly occurring to her. "My house is probably boarded up by now, we left our luggage at the train station, we have none of the baby equipment we need, we don't even have nappies!"

"Ruth, hold Ben, breathe and calm down," Harry said slowly. She took a deep breath, taking his advice and cradled the baby. "Okay," he said. "Your house is not boarded up, it's just as you left it. I have a cleaner go in about once a month to dust it, but I assure you its fine," he said. "Baby stuff can be bought, it won't take long. Everything will be okay."

"Yes, you're right," she said. "Sorry, I'm a little panicky." Ben opened his mouth like a goldfish, but otherwise there was silence.

"And I've had Malcolm send my car over, with a car seat in it. The rest… it can all be sorted out." She leaned towards him and kissed him softly.

Then she signed the discharge papers and said goodbye to the nurse. "So, do the grid know about Benjamin?" Ruth asked as they walked through the hospital halls.

"Malcolm does. He assured me of his full discretion."

"I don't mind if people know," Ruth said softly. "After all, this isn't like last time. What am I going to do, hide a screaming baby?"

"He's been very good," Harry said, ignoring the most important part of that sentence. "Hardly any crying at all since he's been born."

"Yes," Ruth said. "I'm sure there'll be a few sleepless nights for me coming up."

"For us," Harry corrected.

Ruth stopped walking and looked at him. "No, for me," she said. "We… we're not going to be living in the same house Harry. I… I'm not ready to live with you." From the look on his face, he had clearly been assuming they would.

"But… we've been living in each others pockets for weeks. Months," he said, looking bewildered.

"Harry, I've just got my name cleared, I've just come back to the UK and I haven't even set foot in my house yet. I am not ready for us to move in together."

"Okay," he said, clearly disappointed.

"That's not to say I don't love you, and of course I want you to look after him. You know, be his father," she added indicating the bundle in her arms. "And I do want to be in a relationship with you. But living together? It's just too… it's too much for me right now."

"Fine," he said. "I'll drop it. But, I can bring it up at a later date, yes?"

"Yes," she said, her smile wide. "That'd be… very good indeed."

Ben blinked widely, as if approving of this plan and Ruth smiled as they tracked down the car.

* * *

**Thank you for the reviews so far. More soon.**


	12. Chapter 12

Ruth smiled at her house. It was indeed, just as she'd left it. As if the last nine months had never happened. There was no baby things though, so she held her son in her car seat, wondering what on earth to do. She had no cot to put him down in, no blanket to wrap him up in, not even clean nappies. She had nothing.

"Shall I go and… get supplies?" Harry asked.

"That might be an idea," she agreed.

"I'll be quick," he promised. He kissed the top of the babies head, then Ruth briefly. "See you soon." He left, closing the door behind him and Ruth felt a little nervous. Never in her life had she been left alone with a small child, let alone a new born. Now she had one, which she was completely responsible for and the prospect was more than a little daunting.

She put the car seat down on the kitchen table and smiled at her boy. "Hi sweetheart," she said. "Daddy's getting some things for us. In the meantime, you have to make do with me. You can do that right?" Ben blinked, blue eyes watching her intently. "Good lad."

After checking that he was securely strapped in, Ruth hurried to her linen cupboard, surprised at how clean and neatly everything was folded. Clearly the cleaner Harry had hired did a bit more than dust. Ruth quickly grabbed some blankets and pillows, bringing them back to the kitchen. Ben was right where she'd left him sixty seconds before. She smiled. "Right then."

* * *

In the car, Harry thought to himself about the last couple of days. He was very disappointed that Ruth had said no. She didn't want him there. Or at least, not to live together. Though he could see her point, it still hurt. He wanted to be a part of his sons life, as much as possible. He wanted to be around Ruth as much as possible too.

Even though he was hurt by what felt like her rejecting him, he was determined not to show it. It would only drive a wedge between the pair of them which would make things worse. He wasn't going to let his bruised pride get in the way of his family. He would be the best possible father that he could be to Ben. But he also acknowledged that being a good father would mean telling Catherine and Graham about the baby very soon. They were conversations he wasn't looking forward to.

* * *

When Harry came home, nearly two hours later the car bursting with shopping bags, he found the Ruth laying on the sofa, the baby sleeping on her chest.

"He looks so uncomfortable," Harry said. Ben was curled up, as if he'd been squashed into a ball, arms and legs all tucked in tightly as Ruth stroked his hair.

"Well, I guess for the past few months he hasn't had the space to stretch out," she said, smiling at Harry. "It must feel natural to him. Successful?"

"Mostly," Harry said. "That cot is going to take months to put together."

"Well I hope not, because he'll need it by then." Harry smiled and kissed the baby's head gently. Then he proffered the bag he'd brought in with him.

"Nappies and some baby wipes," he said. "All the more essential things."

"Great," she said sincerely. "But speak softer. I don't want you to wake him."

"I'll get the rest of the shopping in," he said.

"Thank you."

* * *

"I'd really like a shower," Ruth said as the afternoon wore on, and Harry had finished assembling the cot. "Can you look after him for half an hour?"

"I'm not incapable," he said.

"No, I know," she said. "I don't like leaving him yet. He's all brand new."  
"Take a long bath," he said. "Benjamin's fed and changed, we'll be fine." Ben kicked energetically as if in illustration and Ruth smiled.

"Okay then." She left and Harry stayed still until he heard the shower running. Then he just settled into the quiet contentment of holding Benjamin and rocking him to sleep.

* * *

An hour later, Ruth hadn't appeared. The shower had stopped running ages ago and Harry was beginning to worry about her. So holding the sleeping baby he went upstairs, and after a few moments, he found her. She'd collapsed on her bed, clearly exhausted. Her wet hair was making the duvet damp and she hadn't even managed to get under the covers. Her dressing gown was hanging open, giving Harry an unobstructed view of her breasts. "I think we both have a fondness for those," he told Ben before putting him down in the newly assembled cot. He covered the baby with a blanket, and then did the same for Ruth.

"Hmm? Whats happening?"

"Go to sleep," he said gently. Then with more reluctance, "I'm going home."

"M'kay," she mumbled. "Kiss first." He did, softly and lingeringly. "Ben?"

"Sleeping in the cot by your bed," he said. "I'll be here first thing in the morning."

"Mmm," she said lazily. "Night."

"I love you."

"Love you too," she said, curling up on her side and drifting into a much deeper sleep. Harry stroked her hair, then quietly left the house, locking the door behind him.

* * *

**More soon. Thanks for the reviews so far.**


	13. Chapter 13

Ruth hurried to the door at seven in the morning after the bell rang. She was bedraggled, tired and at the end of her patience. It had been a sleepless night for her, with Ben wanting feeding every two hours, almost on the dot. He'd been screaming for her too, whenever she hadn't moved fast enough, the sound making her eardrums throb. She opened the door to see an annoyingly fresh faced Harry standing there.

"Oh. Bad night?" he asked, smiling at the baby in her arms.

"You could say that," she said through gritted teeth, handing over Ben to his father.

"I can't stay very long," he said, voice soft over the baby. "I have to go."

"Oh," she said, disappointment clear.

"It isn't like that," he said. "I have to meet Catherine. And break the news about Ben."

"Oh," she said, in a completely different tone of voice. "Do you think she'll take it well?"

"I have no idea," he said. "But I doubt me being late for breakfast will improve matters."

"Yes," she said, agreeing. As Harry was holding the baby, she collapsed onto the sofa and closed her eyes.

"He seems as good as gold today," Harry said.

"Mm," Ruth replied. "Saving his best behaviour for his dad." Harry smiled at her and then his son. "He's good really," she said. "Just tiring getting up all night with him."

"I'll be back in a few hours," he said. "I need to check in with the grid, but it'll be quick, then I'll be back."

"I want to know how it goes," she said. "Catherine can come and meet him if she wants. Of course she can."

"I'll mention that if it comes up," he said. "Where are the nappies?"

"Er… in the kitchen," she said blankly. "Wh…?"

"I'll be right back," he said, taking Ben with him. Ruth smiled tiredly. A man prepared to change a babies nappy, just so that she didn't have to move? It must be love, she thought to herself.

* * *

Harry was slightly early, but he ordered Catherine a coffee anyway. She wouldn't be very long. Sure enough, the door of the café opened and she blew in, hair very windswept.

"Oh, hi dad," she said, as he stood up to hug her. "Have you been here long?"

"No," he said. "How are you?" he asked as they sat down.

"Good," she said. She cradled her coffee, warming her hands and then looked at him over the rim of the mug. "What is it?" she asked.

"What is what?" he said.

"You've got that look," she said. "The look you had when you told me you were getting a divorce. What?"

"It's not bad news," he said. "It might be a bit of a shock though."

"Just tell me." Harry sighed and opened his wallet. In it was a brand new picture of Ben. He handed the picture over and spoke. "I… have another child. Ben. He's... er... he's only a few days old." Catherine said nothing, just stared at the picture in silence for minutes on end.

"Please say something. Anything."

"How long have you known?" she asked quietly.

"A few weeks," he said. "I didn't know. That Ruth was pregnant, I didn't know."

"Oh, is this _the_ Ruth? The Ruth that you were devastated about when she was exiled?" Catherine asked, sliding the photo back across the table.

"I wasn't devastated," he defended.

"Yes you were," she said, a smile twitching on her lips.

"Anyway, I didn't know. I got her name cleared, and I went across Europe to find her. We've only been back in London a few days."

"And got a surprise when you did?"

"You're taking this very well," he said.

"Well, I came to the conclusion a long time ago that I should never be shocked by anything you do. Were you expecting me to shout and scream?"

"I've been dreading telling you," he admitted. "I didn't want you to feel…"

"I'm surprised," she said calmly. "How old is he?"

"Four days," he said with a smile.

"He looks like Graham," she said with a smile. "When he was a baby."

"I know he does." Harry paused uncomfortably. "How is your brother?"

"He's doing okay," Catherine said. "This might make him… a bit upset."

"Yeah," Harry said. "Have you got a number for him?"

"Yes," Catherine said. "But don't tell him over the phone."

"I won't," he said. "Thanks."

"He's gorgeous," Catherine said, forcing a smile.

"Thank you for taking this so well," he said sincerely. She smiled at him.

"I am a little… well, surprised," she finished. "I wasn't expecting that."

"Understandable," he said. "Let me buy you breakfast." She nodded with enthusiasm.

* * *

Harry arrived at Ruth's house at around two in the afternoon. He'd been held up at the grid, and he had called to say he'd be late but she'd sounded worn out. He did have his own key, so he let himself in, and quietly looked around the house. It was silent, almost worryingly so. He went upstairs and heard the reassuring sound of Ruth's breathing before he saw her. She was wrapped in her duvet, curled on her side looking at Ben in the cot.

"You wake him and I will kill you," she promised in a very quiet whisper.

"It's two in the afternoon," he murmured back.

"And I've been awake since two in the morning," she said. "If Ben's asleep, I'm going to try."

"I'll leave you alone," he said after a moments indecision.

"No, get in bed next to me," she said. "If you don't mind the decadence of sleeping in the afternoon?"

Harry took his clothes off in the silence, so he was wearing just his undershirt and his boxers before sliding into bed next to her. He wrapped his arms around her body, finding that she was wearing very little. His hand rose to cup her full breast. She sighed into his embrace.

"I'm an idiot," she said, voice still low to not disturb the baby.

"Why?"

"Who the hell was I kidding? I can't do this on my own."

"Of course you can," he said surely. "You're the most brilliant woman I've ever met, and I'm in a business where I meet many brilliant people. But you're not on your own. And I did tell you that I could be here if you wanted… help."

"I know," she said. "If you wanted to stay here, I don't think I'd mind that much."

"You know how to stroke a mans ego," he said sarcastically.

"Maybe not, but I know how to stroke other things, and that's more important," she said, clearly amused.

"Don't talk filthy with a baby in the room," he chastised gently. She laughed quietly and then faded away into quietness.

"How did Catherine take it?" her voice getting a little slurred with tiredness.

"She was fine," he said softly. "I'll tell you when you wake up."

"Mm, good." He kissed the back of her neck and then she was gone into sleep. With his arms around her, there was nowhere else he'd rather be.

* * *

**This will be the last chapter for about a week. I'm going to Scotland for a few days so will be taking a bit of a break. In the meantime, please leave a review, and thanks for reading.**


	14. Chapter 14

**I know it's been a while, so sorry for the delay. Enjoy**

* * *

About a week later Ruth found herself walking to the spare room, Harry's hands over her eyes. "I know you've been decorating," she said. "It's not exactly a secret." It wasn't. The smell of fresh paint had been infecting the entire house for days. But she was letting him be a man and do the whole lot himself. With the result that she hadn't been inside the spare room (now Ben's bedroom) since Harry had started decorating.

He dropped his hands from her eyes and she looked around the sky blue walls, the brand new baby sheets already in the cot and the changing table perfectly assembled. "Harry it's perfect," she said sincerely. "It's beautiful."

"Do you really like it?" he asked. "I wanted to… I wanted there to be a room for Ben. So that he could have his own space."

"And not crowding in on us all the time," she said, her face blossoming into a smile. "That's great." She smiled inwardly at the thought of her and Harry having the bedroom to share between the two of them, rather than the three of them. The privacy would be most welcome.

"Thank you Harry," she said. Before he could reply, they both turned at the sound of their son crying. "I'll just…" Ruth began, backing out of the room before she got to the end of the sentence. Harry followed her downstairs and smiled as he watched Ruth take the baby from Catherine's arms.

"I don't think he likes me," she said.

"Don't be silly," Ruth said. "He's just hungry." She excused herself with the baby as Harry sat down opposite his eldest child. "He's beautiful," Catherine said.

"I know." Harry squeezed her hand across the table.

"You need to tell Graham."

"I know." Harry sighed. "I will, tomorrow."

"Tomorrows always more convenient than today," Catherine said cynically.

"He's working on a building site at the moment," Harry said. "He finishes today. I'm not going to bother him while he's at work, especially as its not going to be a pleasant conversation. So it'll be tomorrow."

"Okay," she replied, dropping the subject. "Ruth's… a bit younger than I thought she'd be."

"Age doesn't matter," Harry said softly.

"No, I suppose not," Catherine said gently. "She's lovely. Quite lovely."

"Thank you," Harry said, not admitting how much that valuation from his daughter meant to him. "I'll talk to Graham tomorrow," he promised.

"Good," Catherine said. She picked up her mug of lukewarm tea and smiled at her father.

"So now we've debated my life, lets get onto your boyfriend," Harry said, a falsely stern note in his voice. Catherine laughed lightly as Ruth came back into the room, Ben in her arms.

"I wondered how long that would take you," Catherine said, still smiling. "Let me hold the baby." Ruth handed Ben over and Catherine's face went as soft as butter.

"I'm too young to be a grandfather," Harry said sternly. "Before you get any ideas."

"And I'm too old to have a newborn baby as a brother," she countered.

"Fair enough." And their were smiles all around.

* * *

"I think that went well," Ruth said, pulling the duvet over them both later that night. "Catherine seemed to like Ben."

"Mm," Harry said. "She did. And Ben was an angel."

"He's actually a good baby," Ruth said. Harry wrapped his arms around Ruth's waist and kissed her shoulder as they lay on their sides, her back to his chest as his hands began to wander.

"Oh, so that's why you wanted Ben to have his own room is it?" she asked, amused.

"I like touching you," he admitted. "And its much more freeing when there isn't a baby watching." His hands slid upwards to her breasts and she sighed against him. His touch was so good on her skin and she only pulled away when she started to feel his erection against her buttocks.

"Harry, we can't," she said. "I haven't got the all clear from the doctor yet. It'll still be a week or so."

"I know," he said. "It doesn't mean I can't touch you for the sheer pleasure of it." He stroked her breasts again. "Unless you don't want me to?"

Her only response was to push back against him with clear enthusiasm. He chuckled in her ear, deep and velvety making her shiver as his hands went over her stomach.

"I'm bigger than I was," she said quietly. "Before. Before I was pregnant."

"Mmhmm," he agreed. She wondered briefly if she should be offended by his quick acceptance of her increased weight, but he was touching her with so much joy that she couldn't find it in her.

"Oh I want you," she whispered.

"Not long to wait," he said. "And this time we need better birth control." She laughed at that.

"Your fault," she said. "How long had you had that condom in your wallet?"

"There was nothing wrong with the condom," he said.

"Apart from the fact it split." Harry shrugged before kissing her neck, slowly and languidly. Ruth couldn't keep the thread of the conversation straight in her mind, so she let it drop. Harry's lips felt too good on her skin to make her think about much else.

* * *

**More soon. Thanks for reading and especially reviewing.**


	15. Chapter 15

**Thanks for the great reviews. I hope this chapter is living up to standards, as I always have trouble writing Graham.**

* * *

Harry sat down on a bench in St James's Park, waiting for his son to arrive. As much as Graham loudly and repeatedly criticised his fathers career, he had inherited some spook traits himself. Like meeting in public places. This location had been Graham's suggestion after all. Harry had more than a fair amount of doubt that his son would show. So he unfolded today's paper and pretended to read, while really thinking about what he would say to Graham.

"So what do you want?" Harry hadn't even heard Graham coming and hid his surprise as best he could.

"How are you?"

"Now you ask," he said coldly. "I haven't heard from you in what? Five years at least, and now you want to know how I am?"

"I always want to know how you are," Harry said. "I worry about you."

Graham snorted. "What do you want?" he asked, his voice almost dead.

"I have something I need to tell you," he said. "I want to tell you," he edited.

"What?"

Harry took in a deep breath, wondering where to begin. In the end he kept it short and sweet. "I have another child."

"Oh," Graham said calmly.

"Ben," Harry continued. "He's only two weeks old."

"Okay," Graham said.

"Why…? You're taking this awfully calmly," Harry said. "More so than Catherine even."

A ghost of a smile appeared on his face. "Honestly, I've been expecting you to get another perfect little family ever since you and mum got divorced. I'm not surprised. Just that its taken this long."

"You're my family too," Harry said softly. "I was a shit father," he added bluntly, which made Graham's lips twitch. "But you're my son, and no matter what's happening now, or in the past, you're my family, and always will be."

Graham said nothing, but Harry could feel the thaw starting. Graham relaxed very slightly, so Harry pressed his advantage. "I'm sorry."

"I needed to hear that fifteen years ago," Graham said, not with malice, just a statement of fact.

"I know," Harry said. "And I'm sorry for that too." Harry smiled at his son, not knowing what else to say. Graham surprised him though with his next words.

"Thanks for telling me," he said. "I… appreciate it." Again, a slightly uncomfortable silence. "Did you look me up? To get hold of me?"

"Marginally," Harry said. "I haven't pried into your life, but I wanted your phone number, and I wanted to know that you were… doing okay."

"I am doing okay," he said. "Actually to be honest, I'm doing very well." He rubbed his hands together uncomfortably. "Has Catherine mentioned my news? Has she told you?"

"Told me what?"

Graham took a deep breath. "Clara's… my girlfriend, she's pregnant."

"Oh!" Harry said, more than a little surprised by this. "Oh God! I… don't know what to say."

"Don't criticise me," Graham said, and the desperation to be accepted was clear, making Harry squirm with guilt for his past behaviour.

"I don't think I'm in any position to criticise you," he said firmly. "That's just… I'm very surprised. I… God, I'm going to be a grandfather."

"Yeah," Graham said, biting his lip, clearly nervous. "It's a girl too."

"A girl," Harry repeated, voice faint as he tried to take it in. "Congratulations." Graham saw that his father was being sincere and smiled hesitantly. "When's the baby due?"

"August 21st," he said.

"That's soon."

"Soon enough," Graham said, smiling again. Then he sighed as the awkwardness started to become apparent again. "I should go."

"Thanks for meeting me," Harry said. "I know I've been…"

"Yeah, you have been," he agreed. "You can call me," he said. "If you want."

"I will," Harry promised. "Thank you." Graham smiled slightly and then walked away. When he was out of sight, Harry smiled. That went very well, all things considered. And he was soon going to be a grandfather. That seemed so strange, almost surreal. Especially after his comment to Catherine only yesterday. He knew it had taken a lot for Graham to confide in him, when so often in the past he, Harry had let him down. Harry knew he'd criticised Graham a lot while growing up, and he regretted it deeply. At the time he'd been trying to encourage Graham to give his all, he'd just gone about it the wrong way. But then again, it was never too late to fix his mistakes. And the fact that Graham had even turned up today, meant that he didn't think it was too late either.  
"I'm going to have a granddaughter," he said to himself. "Bloody hell."

* * *

He unlocked the front door, and found Ruth in the kitchen. He leaned against the door frame and watched as she walked around in small circles, Ben in her arms sleeping. "Whenever I put him down he starts crying," Ruth said quietly as she caught Harry's eye. "How did it go?"

"Better than I expected," he said. "Graham's going to have a baby. His girlfriends pregnant."

"Wow," Ruth said, her eyebrows flicking upwards in surprise. "Really?"

"Yes."

"You're going to be a granddad!"

"Thank you for stating that," Harry said sarcastically. Ruth smiled.

"That's exciting," she said.

"More like terrifying," he said.

"Well, that too," she said. "Isn't that the definition of parenting?"

"Mm," he said, sitting down.

"How did he take the news of Ben?"

"Much calmer than I thought," Harry said. "He didn't even seem surprised."

"Did Catherine talk to him, do you think?"

"No," Harry said. "No, she didn't." Harry nodded at the baby and Ruth handed him over. "God, you're getting heavier," he said easily.

"What're you going to be like when he's a toddler, if you think he's heavy now?"

"I'll get stronger arms," he said happily. "Have you had a good day?"

"Apart from the constant crying," she said. "Yeah it's been good." She smiled at their son and sat down next to Harry. "I might sleep now you've got him."

"Has he been fed?" Harry asked practically.

"Yeah, and changed," she said. She leaned over and kissed him hello which she hadn't done yet. "Love you," she said.

"Love you too," he said. He watched her go, clearly tired and then smiled at the sleeping baby. "Shocking as it seems, you're going to be an uncle in a few weeks time." The baby made an incomprehensible sound and Harry smiled.

"God, if I'd have looked into the future a year ago, and seen where I was today, I'd never have believed it." Ben grizzled slightly and Harry followed what Ruth had been doing, walking around the kitchen with him, to calm him. "You're going to be quiet aren't you? Mummy needs some sleep." And amazingly enough, it worked.

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**More soon, but I do think this story is heading towards it's conclusion now. Thanks for reading and especially reviewing.**


	16. Epilogue

**3 months later.**

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Ruth awoke to Harry's lips on her neck. "Mmm," she moaned as she started to return to consciousness. "That feels good." Harry's only response was to let his tongue wander over her skin, making her shiver with pleasure.

"Good morning," he whispered before kissing her lips softly.

"It is a good morning," she said. Good in that Harry was kissing her, Ben was still asleep and she'd woken naturally.

"Happy anniversary," he whispered, stroking her hair away from her face.

"Is it our anniversary?" she asked bewildered.

"One year ago today, I asked you to dinner."

"Oh," she said. "Yes you did. I think it speaks to our lack of self control that a year from our first date, we have a three month old baby."

Harry chuckled. "Yes, well we'd spent years denying ourselves. So who can blame us for… Havensworth."

"Ah yes," she said. "Those explosive five minutes."

"Ten," he edited.

"You know, I still can't really remember that night. It's all a blur. An intense, passionate, fiery… blur."

"Well… yes," he agreed. "It was… intense." He sighed to himself for a moment, thinking about the day ahead. "I'm going to go and see Lucy this morning, then go to work and then I'm taking you out for dinner tonight."

"But Ben…" she started.

"Catherine's going to look after him," Harry said. "It's all sorted."

Ruth smiled at him. "Take pictures of Lucy for me."

"I will," he promised. Harry was in love with his brand new granddaughter and everyone knew it. Lucy's arrival had actually smoothed things over between Graham and Harry. It gave them something neutral to talk about, instead of focusing on the ruin of the past.

"Where are we going for dinner?"

"That great little seafood place you like."

"Oh, that's wonderful!" she said. "God, I can almost taste the prawns already." She smiled happily. They both fell silent as they heard Ben start to wake and gurgle over the baby monitor.

"I'll get him," Harry said.

"He'll want feeding," Ruth said, sitting up. Harry nodded as he left the room, coming back in moments with Ben. He handed the baby over to Ruth and she quickly let the baby latch on to her breast. She stroked his head gently and then looked at Harry.

"Do you know, I'm so happy," she said quietly. Harry smiled at her. "My life has turned out nothing like I thought it would, but I'm so happy right now."

Harry kissed her softly. "That's good to know," he said. "For the record, I'm happy too. And I love you so much."

"I love you too," she said, her blue eyes sparkling at him. "I love my family. Even though it happened very quickly."

"It happened just right," he said. "I'm just sorry you had to leave for those months."

"I'm not," she said. "It's made me appreciate what I have now, and that's a feeling I don't ever want to lose."

"Well, I'm glad," he said. Harry caught sight of the clock. "And I should get going."

"Okay," she said as he moved to get dressed. She watched with pleasure as he displayed his body for a few minutes before covering up. She didn't think she would ever tire of looking at his beautiful body. Soon enough, he was ready to go and he kissed her goodbye. "Take care," she said.

"I will," he promised. He ruffled Ben's hair gently and then left. Ruth leaned back against the pillows, smiling and with Ben still in her arms. Life was good.

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**The End.**

** Thanks for reading, and I hope you have the time to leave one last review. Thank you.**


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